No Cheat Days Allowed

lorra fae wildfire tells you why cheat days are not good for you try to avoid a cheat day to better your life so you can create success and health and become your best self

I don’t have cheat days.

The whole idea of creating a lifestyle change and then damaging it with cheat days is bizarre to me.

When it comes to health and prosperity, why cheat? The changes made are for the betterment of the self, not to deprive oneself of anything.

Cheating on new habits is cheating yourself, and nothing more.

I find an all-or-nothing approach works the best. Give it 100%.

Without a cheat day, there will be BETTER results than expected. If there is competition involved, there will be a advantage. If there is health involved, vibrancy will expand even higher. If there is exercise involved, strength will be taken even further.

Results can only be bigger. Success can only be more imminent. Strength can only be greater. Life can only be better.

Cheating is a lie to oneself. It’s saying, “You’re not good enough to stick with this completely.” It’s saying, “You don’t really want to be doing this. What you really want to be doing is that…and you’re depriving yourself of it.” Deprivation breeds rebellion, and not many people can resist that for long. It’s also a tempting, naughty reward – something to look to the future for, instead of focusing on NOW.

We’re addicts and easy-pleasure seekers – it’s ingrained in us. Our ancient brains tell us to take the easy way, the comfortable way – and with all the choices around us and all the lies we’re fed from every direction, it’s so simple to get overwhelmed and say Fuck It and go for the easy route.

Dreams are not easy. They require complete dedication, not cheating.

Cheating is for people who don’t want the best results. It’s for people who don’t want to be the best possible version of themselves. It’s the opposite of dedication, or obsession.

Obsession is a good thing when it elevates who we want to become. We can’t cheat life, and we can’t fool our bodies, or our minds – so let’s throw the cheat days in the incinerator where they belong, along with all the bullshit that keeps us from being the most galactic versions of ourselves.

We need to remove the locks from the cages that hold those versions in, and we will never get there by cheating – we need to focus on the exact methods to set ourselves free.


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Being a Badass

Me and my ninja man, 2014

I was born to be a badass.

Maybe that sounds arrogant or whatever, but listen to me. This is not me regaling you with tales of awesomeness, it is a story to relate to in whatever way you can. Try and see yourself in this – what were you born to be?

Ever since I was a little girl, the FIERCE FEMALE has called to me. I have been entranced by warriors, enraptured by banshees, and just sucked in by any woman who is Amazonian in nature – femme fatale, vagabond, or fighter. Even when I was interested in modeling, the model who I most wanted to be like was a 6’3 giantess with muscles, not a waif (though I found them beautiful, too – just in a different way).

I preferred She-ra over Barbie, by far.

Why did this come about? I was a weak, sensitive kid, a loner, an only child. I cried all the time – I still do. So how is it possible that I was “born to be a badass?” I WANTED to be tough, because I wasn’t. My path has always been towards strength and wildness, even though I was unaware. Everything thrown in my way has made me more formidable. I have slowly become more and more confident and bold because of conquering all the bullshit in my life – I have never let it DEFEAT me. I never wanted to be rescued, not really. Helped, sure, when necessary – but all the worst hurdles I’ve had were overcome by sheer will to survive. Being a victim was not an option. No princess attitude here.

The path I’ve taken has been slow-moving, but it was all because I was afraid, insecure, and part of me still identifies with my small self, even though my big self is so wildly different. I am still sensitive, but I am not insecure. If I do get that way I find ways to get past it. I am afraid, but still, I always push forward. I challenge myself. I tell myself I am brave and tenacious. I am sometimes anxious, but I trust my intuition. I know when it’s just fear and when it’s my gut telling me to actually STOP. I am at a point where I know what I can do, am willing to do, and I am willing to push through any bullshit to get there.

“We come into this world with a specific, personal destiny. We have a job to do, a calling to enact, a self to become.”

“Our job in this lifetime is not to shape ourselves into some ideal we imagine we ought to be, but to find out who we already are and become it.” – Steven Pressfield, The War of Art.

I don’t need to prove to anyone that I am a badass. I know I am, because I go for what I want. I strengthen myself daily – either by pushing through my personal fears, or not allowing myself to do things I know would make me miserable. I would rather live in my car or in a tent than live a cushy life being someone who isn’t true to herself. I would rather write a blog to 10 people reading and RESONATE with them, than do something just to gather readers, money, and “likes” – fuck that.

I would rather learn skills that mean something to ME than to please someone else. I know what makes me feel strong. I don’t have to prove myself to anyone but ME. I do things to prove to myself I can do them. If anyone says I can’t do something, I will prove them wrong (if I WANT to). If something is important enough to me, I fucking do it, even if it takes me years.

You know when you do something and you think, “Oh my god, why didn’t I do this 10, 20 years ago?” I get that once in a while, but I also realize that on our personal life journeys, things happen when they are meant to, when you are ready for them. The right teacher comes to you when you’re ready. So does the right partner, the right book, the right moment – the epiphanies you need SHOW UP when you are READY and OPEN. Pay attention!

I made a sort-of joke to myself not long ago that I’d like to be a badass for a living. And then I realized I wasn’t joking at all.

Recommended Reading:
Courage: The Joy of Living Dangerously
Feel the Fear . . . and Do It Anyway