When to Take Advice – And When Not To

A lot of people give bad freakin’ advice, and even worse, a lot of people get really good advice…and ignore it.

Deep down, all of us really know what we need to do to fix our problems, but we also ignore ourselves (and we’re lazy). Why do we ignore our better judgment? It’s insane.

A good rule of thumb is that if everyone is giving you the same advice, you should probably take it, or at least try it. But if you know deep inside that it’s not the right decision for you, listen to THAT, first.

Intuition first, advice second.

You never want to blindly follow the masses; they are almost always wrong. – G. Cardone

 

Another point to keep in mind is that whoever you’re taking advice from should be getting the results that YOU desire.

Take health and lifestyle advice from people who are thriving.
Take financial advice from people who aren’t struggling.
Take life advice from people who are living their passions and who are free. You know, happy people.
Take relationship advice from people who are still madly in love after years of being together.

How many times have you read a manual, then read another, and then another, and still not taken an action?

Have you actually ever followed someone else’s map instead of just reading it?

Even better, have you ever created your OWN map, and followed that?  Or is it still just floating in your head, along with thought bubbles for “one day” and “maybe?”

Here’s some good advice: Write that shit DOWN. Follow the map. Discover buried treasure (your possible life).

Listen to the cues of the universe. Often, the answers you are seeking are colliding with you from all sides, but you are oblivious to them because you aren’t open to changing.

Staying stagnant, staying still, are easy. Movement and change are hard. Us humans hate hard, but it’s the only way to get better.

And if you weren’t in need of a change, you wouldn’t be searching. You wouldn’t be reading this now. You wouldn’t feel the need for advice.

Often, we don’t need advice at all. We want reassurance. We want to be told what we want to hear so we don’t have to take responsibility for ourselves.

The best advice is from the voice inside. Stop numbing it. Stop ignoring it.

Stop hoping things will change, and change yourself. It’s the only way to glory.

~~~

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If you enjoyed this post (or any of my posts!), please consider a small (or large!) donation to fund my way to a martial arts seminar. There are rewards for certain amounts given, so please help out with a “tip” or a gift! You’ll be helping me to improve so I can teach other women to kick ass in the future!

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You Were MEANT for This!

Once in a while I doubt myself. Don’t you?

Actually, quite often. I think this is pretty normal, unless you’re blessed with that natural confidence that is just within you since childhood, usually nurtured by everyone around you. That’s a gift that most people do not have.

When I get like this, I start to question the beliefs that come up, and turn them around.

Today, I felt like…”Everything I am doing is a waste of time.”

Do you feel like this whenever you start something new, make yourself vulnerable, or try putting yourself out there?

Try turning it around.

Like so:
NOT doing these things is a waste of time. Everything ELSE is a waste of time.”

Why else would we have these deep desires unless we were meant to DO them?

Don’t just dream themstep in the direction of those desires. They’re within us for a reason. They aren’t just accidental.

We also are no accidents. We are created into this world because we are meant to be here.

We are imbued with these desires and hopes not to taunt us, but to inspire us to get off our asses and DO.

 

~~~

Please leave a comment and share!!

If you enjoyed this post (or any of my posts!), please consider a small (or large!) donation to fund my way to a martial arts seminar. There are rewards for certain amounts given, so please help out with a “tip” or a gift! You’ll be helping me to improve so I can teach other women to kick ass in the future!

You can also follow me on:

Instagram: Lorrafae and Passion School

Twitter: MissLorra

Facebook: Lorra Fae Wildfire

Snapchat: Lorrafae

Save

How to Tell if You Are Dying

Confused on why you feel like shit? Just always feel like hell, no matter what you do? Always easier just to sit around, stare at a screen, and eat cake for dinner?

You’re dying.

Mentally, and physically.

Here are some other symptoms:

  • You prefer to be asleep, so you can live in your dreams, instead of making them a reality.
  • You believe that it is inevitable to deteriorate with age, that it is normal to feel like shit, gain weight, ache in all places, be stiff, bored, uninterested in anything but TV and going to the bar.
  • You eat processed foods, anything called “junk” food, or animal products.
  • You’re on medication.
  • You don’t move your body much. You sit all the time.
  • You don’t remember what it’s like to be a kid. You’ve disassociated because it’s too painful to remember – you think you’ve lost that part of yourself.
  • You don’t sleep enough and rely on stimulants to get through the day.
  • You believe you have to “get through the day” as if every day is a punishment.
  • You spend your time doing things you loathe.
  • You spend your time around people you loathe.
  • You loathe yourself.
  • You complain about everything.
  • You scoff at happy people.
  • You constantly think “Why bother?”
  • You dread everything.
  • You consider yourself a victim.

These are not life pains, these are signs of a dying soul.

You have strength within you, even if it’s a tiny spark; if you FAN that with movement and desire, it will BURST INTO FLAMES.

In my next post, I will teach you how to come alive, to burn like wildfire, to see life as a dance with the universe, instead of a spiral into monotony and drabness.

You are not really dying – you just aren’t truly living.

How to Stick to Your Goals and Become Amazing

While I was on the ferry home to Victoria from Vancouver, I was in my car and thinking about how “off” I got when I was not in my regular routine and visiting my family. How I, along with so many people, allow themselves to cheat or push things aside that are important to them when they go “away” – but you are not “away.” You are still in your body, you still have your mind, you still have all the same dreams and desires you had before – don’t neglect them.

When I go to Vancouver, I start visiting all these raw and vegan food places I “miss” and binge on things that I know are not great for me (though to everyone else they’d be ridiculously healthy – but for me, I feel the difference). Funny thing is that I didn’t even enjoy many of those things. I started to neglect the workout regime I’ve been very dedicated to for the last 2 months – luckily I did a little bit, but when I was sitting in my car thinking about it, really I could have done everything normally, I just made excuses. I wasn’t going on “vacation” and even if I was, I wouldn’t go “away” to escape from my freaking goals. Going “away” is to visit people, see new places, escape from work – NOT to neglect what is important to you.

And so I decided, along with the word “tenacious,” that I wanted to be able to describe myself as “dedicated.” Similar, yes, but decidedly different. Next time I go to visit the mainland, or anywhere, I will know to factor in EVERYTHING that is important to me that I do regularly, and to not skip it or sabotage it just because I make the excuse of being AWAY.

So, what are you? How could you be defined? How do you WANT to be defined? What words would you like to describe yourself by? Start calling yourself those things and you will become them.

What are you dedicated to? As you can see, I have neglected writing in my blog for a couple of weeks – I consciously made that decision, as I was starting to rebel against the schedule I set for myself. I do well with guidelines, but not strict rules. However, I have neglected writing in general, which to me is just sacrilege. Even if I am not writing here, I must write. Daily. And so I dedicate myself.

I dedicate myself fully to writing, to raw foods, and to fitness. I dedicate myself to my Ninjutsu practice. I dedicate myself to animal welfare and preserving the planet as much as I can. Everything on my list are things I dedicate myself to DAILY or at least weekly. Having this reminder to look at every day is paramount to my success. It’s so easy to forget goals and things that make us better people – we all want to be the best versions of ourselves. It’s stupid to envy others and want to be them – why not be the best YOU? Have you even tried that?

All of those adjectives I wrote…I already am, or am becoming. Always have things to strive for. I love myself as is, but I want to become better and better. Why wouldn’t I? Or you? So many people give up – “I’m too old” or “I’m too fat” or “I’m too boring.” What you tell yourself you are, you are. Tell yourself something different. Make it something you can BELIEVE, though. Even if you are a couch potato, you can say “I am athletic” because you actually are – you just have to wake that part of yourself UP. Your body has always been athletic, but you have to use it in that way! You have always been healthy, but you have to give your body the right conditions to thrive in! Allow it to heal! You have to do the work. This is sort of like affirmations, but not. You really have to find that part of yourself that can believe what you are saying. You’re not going to believe you are something if you aren’t that way IN THAT MOMENT, so choose your words carefully. Find a way to believe it. Dig deep, question everything. Find the truth in what you are saying.

You are worthy and you are capable. You are resilient. Get out there and live.

What Are You Going to Do Otherwise?


A huge passion of mine is ninjutsu, which I do three times a week. On Monday I felt a bit resistant towards going. Throughout the day leading up to the hour-long drive to class, I fought against it – and then the best question ever came into my mind!

“What are you gonna do otherwise?”

My answer was, “Probably play on my computer or something.”

I said back to myself, “Is that going to make you a better ninja?”

I smirked and replied, “No….”

Very effective. Next time you are resistant to something you know you WANT to do (not should do), ask yourself that question.

Don’t wanna go to the gym? What would you be doing instead? Watching TV? Is that going to get you the body you want? Are Ross and Rachel gonna rip your abs and blast your fat? Nuh uh.

Don’t feel like working on your novel? What are you gonna do? Read Cracked and Buzzfeed? Are you insane? Open your flipping MS Word and type, bitch!

Don’t feel like practicing your oboe? Let me guess…you’d rather check out what OTHER people are doing on Facebook.

Sitting around and wishing for stuff is gonna get you nowhere. We have limited time on this plane of existence. You need take whatever steps possible to get you to where you want to be. Enjoy each step. Just because steps are small do not mean you should brush them off and fill up your time with meaningless junk. You can do that if you want, but do the important things FIRST. The more little steps you take, the closer you will be, the better you will be, the more you will be making of your life. Everything large is made of something small.

Tonight I’m going to class again. I usually want to go, but I always go regardless of how I feel, and I am ALWAYS glad I do. You will be glad you take your steps, too. But DO them.

Recommended Reading:

The War of Art: Break Through the Blocks and Win Your Inner Creative Battles
Turning Pro: Tap Your Inner Power and Create Your Life’s Work
Do the Work

Obsessions Can Lead to Purpose

Zine Art by me (of me), 2000

I’ve been reading a hell of a lot of graphic novels + comics lately – I go through phases where I eschew (well, not totally – I am always reading many things at once) regular reading to let drawings do the talking. This is especially easy since the Vancouver library system has a shit-ton of good graphic novels that I can borrow in bulk.

Once in a while I feel like I am wasting my time on them, but often I find them uplifting, and often so mesmerizing that upon finishing, I hug them to my chest and sigh (I do this with all amazing books). Until the other day, it sort of hit me – all of my passions seemed to coalesce together and I thought…why am I not drawing and writing graphic novels?

My favourite sort are autobiographical – the whole passion for them started years and years ago when I discovered I Never Liked You by Chester Brown and Blankets by Craig Thompson – I’d always liked comics but nothing really captured my heart (except things like Johnny The Homicidal Maniac) – the personal aspect is what really drew my attention.

I’ve always loved coming-of-age stories, memoirs, diaries – I have kept journals since I was 12 (I ripped up the first two unfortunately, but I have many books starting from age 14) – my preferred drawing style is pen-and-ink and I’ve been drawing since I was 2 – I think I’m pretty good.

Latest work, 2011, Yo-Landi

So why didn’t I make this connection before? I’ve even MADE comics. I made many silly, nonsense comics with friends in the late 90s, and I even did a 4-page comic for my boyfriend for our first anniversary.

2010

So, suddenly I thought, wow, I should do autobiographical comics…then I could, write, draw, and I certainly have enough material, detailed material!

I seriously dunno why I haven’t seriously considered it before, but now that I am really into the idea, I feel like it’s the thing I’m meant to do.

Maybe it’s because I’m so clear-headed from how I eat? It’s the happiness that comes from that, and from the copious amount of sun I’ve been getting.

All I know is that I have many project ideas swirling in my brain, now, more than ever before. I get the most flow, groove, and motivation when I am eating REALLY clean. It’s like downloading the universe in one swoop (maybe it was all that lightning we got last night, dancing outside my window).

I still want to write regular fiction, but this is the creative-block-killer that I’ve been needing.

What is your passion? Do you have as many as me? I have so many that it is overwhelming at times and I end up not being able to focus on one and end up doing nothing – that’s why something that incorporates a lot of my interests at once is a relief.

A Purpose For When You Feel There’s No Point

Aimee Mullins

Are you obese, or depressed, or really sick?

Do you feel like you have no purpose, do you think you are useless, whatever, no good, a waste, that you have nothing to offer anyone or have no purpose in life? That you are just gonna waste away and nothin’ you can do about it?

I can tell you a purpose. You can be an inspiration.

For me, who is already slim and fairly fit and very healthy (I wasn’t always!), I am most inspired by the massive transformations people have. I need to continually be inspired in order to remember how important being healthy is, how important LIVING is. I am most inspired by people who are told “You will need to take these pills forever” or “You are going to die unless you have gastric bypass surgery” or “You will never walk again” or countless other things – and then those people prove everyone wrong by IGNORING what EVERYONE says and by believing in themselves. They find one SHRED of love for themselves and hold on to it like it is life support, and they do one little bit at a time, until they get better, and better, and better, and they feel more self love, and people start noticing, and the onlookers spur them on, and so that momentum grows, and then those people start being heroes, and you can be one of those people, too.

If you are really at the END of your rope – a miserable curmudgeon, someone who is extremely overweight, someone with eating disorders, someone on massive amounts of pills for an “incurable” disease – you can change all of this and be a beacon of hope for others, to show them it CAN be done, and there is ALWAYS room for more inspiration, there is ALWAYS room for more people that show us what can be done when we ignore the bullshit and follow our hearts.

The thing is, even when what you are working on healing is “invisible” (like mental issues), people around you will notice a change – you get this glow about you. Even if you are not losing weight rapidly, your skin will start to shine and your demeanor will be sparkling. You become a magnet for good things, which becomes a whirling dervish of positive vibes. They keep coming, and that’s what makes it even easier to continue.

Your purpose, now, is to transform for the good of everyone, not just you. Start where you are, take photos, take videos, and chronicle your journey. It makes no difference if it takes days, months, or years – It will uplift someone so much that they will make positive changes in their own lives – beauty and love transform others, and then it goes on and on and on, endlessly.

THAT is a grand purpose to hold in your mind, and when you accomplish your goals, you will be free and clear and know what you are meant to do in life. In the meantime, be an inspiration.

One last thing: temporary slip-ups are not failures. Even I have days where I don’t adhere to my highest aspirations – I brush off and keep going. That is the secret of succeeding – even the most amazing people have days and moments they are not reaching the bar they have set – just try again, and you will reach it.