Finding Passion and Freedom in All Forms

I go through long phases of hard-core dedication to blogging. Schedules work for a while, but then I just want to rebel.

I have a different perspective on what I want this place to be. I don’t want to make it completely about advice or inspiration from a “Do this” sort of perspective.

I want it more to be about how I am going about living my life and living in a way that is free, passionate, and bold.

Share how I’m doing it. How I’m making my way through muck and bullshit and money problems and still paving a way, in whatever way I can dream up.

Yeah I’ll still write some inspirational stuff, too, but not because I have a weekly schedule, but because I really feel like writing it.

You know? I don’t like anything to feel forced. Feeling forced feels disgusting. Forced, or fake, or whatever – no. I believe in everything I say and suggest, but I don’t want to plop myself down and say “Okay inspire people.”
People will be inspired or not – it’s not something I can predict.

I’d rather people be inspired by what I do – not what I say.

And sometimes, honestly, I want to lie around and read. I want to go for a dip in the lake. I want to laugh at stupid videos. Sometimes I just want to daydream, or float in the river, or draw elaborate drawings while listening to music or podcasts.

For the last few months I have been overwhelming myself with information, and while I love doing that I eventually need some time to EMPTY myself. I get too full. I need space. And so, while I am dedicated, I can only do that for so long before I need a break to actually integrate that info and then make room for new stuff.

If we get too full of outside information, it doesn’t leave room for our own thoughts and ideas. And that’s where I am at right now. The emptying phase. The time where I cultivate. And the ideas and creativity are alarming. I can’t keep up. I write it all down and want to do it all. It’s crazy – and so much of me is like AGHHH because I just like to chill out in nature and read books. I’m easy to please. I want to eat delicious plant food and write.  I want to go on road trips and dip into swimming holes and go surfing on the coast.

That’s all I really want. Freedom.

Freedom is my #1, it’s my only real goal in life. To do whatever I want – because this is how we are meant to be. We aren’t meant to be tied to anything, we aren’t meant to slave away and grind.
And so this blog is going to be about passion, yes, but really, it’s about finding freedom in all forms.

Lovingly,

Lorra

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Why Taking Risks is Crucial to Staying Alive

Lorra Fae Wildfire of Passion School will inspire you to go after your dreams and desires by encouraging you to take risks in life.

Tofino, 2003. Where I moved spontaneously for a year and still dream about.

It makes sense why hardly anyone goes after their dreams.

We wake up and work for other people for hours on end, going home exhausted, too tired to do what we really want to do. And on days off, we spend doing chores or errands, staying distracted, wasting time,  “keeping busy” instead of doing what is important to us.

The real shit. The important stuff is not the laundry or the dishes, it’s not playing video games, it’s not staring at a phone looking for cartoon creatures, it’s not clearing clutter off the desk or dusting the shelves. Those things can wait until after the important work – the stuff that feeds our souls.

Did you know that JK Rowling says the reason she managed to write while in poverty and get so much done, is because she lived in squalor for years?

She knew where the priorities were: Her daughter, and her dreams. The rest could wait – it’s not going anywhere.

We have it backwards. Either we need to get up REALLY early and go after what we want before we sell our souls to others to get our basic needs met, or not have “jobs” at all, and focus on our real work. Ourselves.

Your real job is yourself.

Your real money is TIME. The real focus should be FREEDOM, not things that tie us down.

We need to minimize, focus, and take little steps towards what we most desire. You know, the things your heart sings to you every night, what you daydream about while you’re stuck in the drudgery of your JOB, or what you imagine life being if you could only escape.

That is what really needs to be done, and the only way to get there is to get everything down to SIMPLE, and to take the first small step….

Eventually, we must take a GIANT one.

It has to be scary, or it’s not worthwhile.

It doesn’t need to all be worked out – in fact thinking about the outcome TOO much may hinder it from happening at all. We think about all that could go wrong, instead of all that could go right.

The thing is, we can’t imagine everything that will come our way. We simply can’t fathom certain things in life.

For example, there is no way in hell I would have ever imagined working for someone I looked up to for so long – even becoming her friend, but to have her offer me work, work that I enjoy, and that I can do nomadically and at my leisure (as long as it gets done) – never in my wildest imagination did I even consider this would be a possibility. People beg her for mentorship and to work for her, and it just fell in my lap. I didn’t even have to try. The only “step” I took was writing about how I felt about a situation happening to her, which she happened to read, and then we spoke and over time became friends. I was struggling to find a job, I couldn’t find anything in this new city I moved to – and eventually I got sick of that process and tried the opposite – ANYTHING and everything I could do to make money on my own.

Not long after, she offered me work because she wanted to help me – and she needed help, too. We helped each other.

I fully believe that this happened because my mindset changed and I started looking at life in a different way – one where I did not need a typical job to get by. I could hustle up my own way, and this allowed me so much freedom and so much more opportunity. It got rid of the humiliating processes of job-searching, the daunting, menial, boring tasks of writing cover letters and resumes – it allowed me to use my BRAIN, to problem solve, and to FIND SOLUTIONS.

No one else was offering me a solution when I wrote out my plan. No one else came to my rescue. I took responsibility, instead of feeling like a victim, and I also focused on the goodness of not being able to find a job – the freedom it allowed me. I wrote out my Plan Z and it sounded like an adventure, not destitution. But when I was finally in this mindset, a perfect opportunity came to me, that I still do in conjunction with everything else I have thought out.

Everything I do now allows me a lot of freedom. Freedom is my number one value. I can work from wherever I am, at what I enjoy. I get to say yes or no to any sort of work I take on. I set my schedule. I set my own pace. I am in charge of me, no one else.

My point in all this is to say: Jobs are something human beings should do as LITTLE as possible, so our most precious resource (TIME) can be utilized to LIVE, and to do the work we are MEANT to do – OUR OWN. Even if we do have to slave for others, in order to have enough to get by, raise children, and more, the bits of time we can allot for ourselves make every shred of difference to what will come to us in the future if we focus on simplifying our lives and focusing NOW on what we want.

The things we have always imagined. The things we have desired since childhood – the fantasies we always have. THOSE things. They are not meant to be ignored. You can do anything at all. It doesn’t matter. People surf with one arm, people snowboard who have no legs, people write books who can’t move their bodies, people escape prisons, escape war-torn countries, people survive being lost at sea – WE can overcome our stupid problems. None of these people were taught how to do these things – they managed to do them because the alternative was soul-death, a wasted life, complete and utter despair. A suicide. A half-life. They did anything and everything they could to get what they wanted, and it’s all because they were determined and knew precisely what they wanted to accomplish.

Instead of lamenting our lots in life, we must start to look for all the threads that lead away from them. They’re there, we just have to look for them – every place has ways out. Every dream has ways to begin. We just don’t want to consider them. We start off saying “I can’t.”

We need to start off saying, “I can – but how?”

And then we plan, we plot, we draw maps, we set sights on what we want, on those realities just waiting to come to life – because they can. They CAN. Despite ANY reason we can think up, they are possible.

We decide whether to prosper, survive, succeed, overcome – or we decide to turn over, be pummeled, and be steamrolled into a flat version of who we really are.

We don’t believe the visions we have of what we could be.

But we can all be them. The belief needs to be there. When we get away from the bullshit of life (the people who tell us no, the ones who tell us we’re expendable or stupid, the ones who break our hearts, the jobs that kill our souls, the towns that are so backwards we feel like aliens) and start honing in on what could allow us to move forward, we start to see the possibilities, and we start to gain confidence that JUST MAYBE we could do this thing – whatever it may be.

That fear needs to be conquered. It means we need to change ourselves.

It means we can’t identify as victims anymore.

This is the key – to choose another label. To choose one of the following: Survivor. Hero. Heroine. Boss. Warrior. Champion. Goddess. Star. Luminary. Explorer. Adventurer. Protector. Winner. Defender. Advocate. Queen. The Greatest. Fighter. Saviour.

Ditch the idea of being a victim. We are all victims of something – how we choose to overcome our setbacks is what makes the difference.

When we choose other labels, we must change ourselves – our behaviours, our beliefs, our lifestyles, in order to match our chosen identity. Then everything else will change. Friends and family may not like it, there may be backlash, struggles with money may occur – none of it MATTERS. What matters is that we become who we are meant to be – because when we are who we are supposed to be, WE LIFT EVERYONE ELSE UP WITH US.
We become inspirations, we become MENTORS. We become beacons of HOPE. We show everyone else that yes, we are humans beings, like you, who did nothing more than take a RISK, and that risk is the only thing standing between EVERY single person and what they have always wanted.

Risk doesn’t have to be so big that you potentially crash and ruin everything and everyone around you, but it has to be big enough that you change internally and your life shifts dramatically for the better.

“Take the leap” is not a cliche – it’s a bona fide CALL for everyone to step off that cliff – the landing may be hard, but we will survive – and if not? What’s the alternative? A half-life? Give me PASSION and authenticity ANY day over basic existence. We will survive, our children will survive, and they will learn from us that risk and passion is worth any adversity that might challenge us along the way.

We are imbued with life for only one reason – TO LIVE.

~~~

Please leave a comment and share!!

If you enjoyed this post (or any of my posts!), please consider a small (or large!) donation to fund my way to a martial arts seminar. There are rewards for certain amounts given, so please help out with a “tip” or a gift! You’ll be helping me to improve so I can teach other women to kick ass in the future!

You can also follow me on:

Instagram: Lorrafae and Passion School

Twitter: MissLorra

Facebook: Lorra Fae Wildfire

Snapchat: Lorrafae

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4 Reasons You Should Do Morning Pages to Improve Your life

4 Ways Morning Pages from The Artist's Way can Change your Life for the better

Morning Pages are the brainchild of Julia Cameron, who famously wrote The Artist’s Way back in 1992 – a book I have had in my home for well over a decade. Earlier this year, I felt a soft whisper in my mind – a call to finally read the book and do what it contained.

Morning Pages involve three pages of stream-of-consciousness writing every day when you wake up, before anything else, and you’re not allowed to stop, or edit, or really even think about what you’re writing. You spill your guts. You literally write whatever comes to mind. You can write “blah blah blah” until something else starts to form. It’s a release – you just open up and let it all fall on to paper.

Back in 1999 or so, I did start the course of the book, but didn’t get far, mostly because I was terrible at getting up early.

I was also put off by the use of the word “God” – even though it does not need to be read as a literal, religious term when it comes to the book. Once I got past this, the true worth of the book’s contents could shine. To allow one word or a basic concept to shroud the rest of it was absurd to me. (This was also something I struggled with in regards to the Anastasia series).

I did continue with Morning Pages for a while, but was deterred because I was so easily called to hit my snooze button, or I was more likely lured by the call of the Internet, still a fairly new addiction back then.

This year, however, I stuck with Morning Pages, and have, daily for months on end. I have completed about 8 weeks of the Artist’s Way and was so overwhelmed with ideas and inspiration (along with other things that stole my time) that the last few weeks are still something I need to finish.

The Morning Pages stuck, though, because they have been instrumental in my life changes.

They got me to start creating again. They lit a fire within me. They got me to quit my stupid job. They led me to see what was absolutely stupid in my life and what I needed to change.

They can do the same for you.

 

  1. They will show you your patterns.

When you start your day with writing about anything that comes to mind, and without thinking about it, patterns show up. When you find yourself writing about the same things over and over, you start to realize how monotonous and boring your life has become. You’ll start to see the same old complaints day in and day out. “My job sucks. I hate my life. My partner is annoying. I need to eat better. I feel sick again. I am depressed. I need to sleep more. I have a dry mouth. I woke up 10 times last night. I wish I could go on vacation. I don’t want to go to work. I’m sick of cleaning this bloody house.” Or whatever. On and on.

Our constant complaints, and what our subconscious spills out on the page consistently, comes to the forefront of our minds where we start to think constantly and consciously about them. We discover what things need to change. Then, we can start to write about alternatives.

       2. They will allow your subconscious to speak to you clearly.

We are so bombarded with information and distractions that it becomes almost impossible to listen to our inner voices, and to our hearts. Having 15-20 minutes of stream-of-consciousness writing allows us to FOCUS and also spill out what has been brewing without our even noticing, due to everything else going on. Then, those hidden gems are right in front of us, where we can see them start coming to life.

       3. They will inspire new life and new creations

Most people have their best ideas randomly, when they have no distractions. In the shower, walking, swimming, exercise, washing the dishes, meditation, the moments before falling asleep – singular tasks that don’t require a lot of thought – when your mind is allowed to wander. Often when people have these ideas, they’re fleeting because they are in a place where they do not have the means to write them down, and the ideas fly away like tiny birds, never to be seen again. With Morning Pages, they spill out ON paper, so even though you may not always want to re-read your pages, at least you know where those ideas are. They are made immortal, they can always be revisited. Thus, it will inspire action. You’ll have your beautiful ideas ready for you, and they can’t escape, they are caged, just waiting to be freed!

       4. They allow a fresh start to the day.

The pages are incredibly helpful for waking up. I’ve often started them while groggy, only to be wide awake upon finishing. On days where I have woken in a melancholy state, I have worked through it on paper and end up feeling hopeful. The days where I haven’t wanted to do them have been the more beneficial. I’ve had the most insight, and the most positive effect.

I highly encourage you to at least try this practice, even if you don’t go through the whole Artist’s Way course (which I do recommend doing()! Try it for at least a month and see what changes happen for you.

If none do…practice the pages for longer. I promise, you can expect great things to occur.

~~~

Please leave a comment and share!!

If you enjoyed this post (or any of my posts!), please consider a small (or large!) donation to fund my way to a martial arts seminar. There are rewards for certain amounts given, so please help out with a “tip” or a gift! You’ll be helping me to improve so I can teach other women to kick ass in the future!

You can also follow me on:

Instagram: Lorrafae and Passion School

Twitter: MissLorra

Facebook: Lorra Fae Wildfire

Snapchat: Lorrafae

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How The Revenant Inspired Me to Be Better

From about 1993 until this year, A Clockwork Orange was my favourite film.

I’ve seen it over 45 times, and was seriously obsessed with anything to do with it as a teenager.

Then I saw the Revenant.

I know that this might not seem to go with the theme of this blog but wait….

When I saw it, throughout the whole thing, I was riveted – I knew before I ever saw it that it may end up being my very favourite movie because it combined things I really love in film – wilderness survival, beautiful cinematography, and a revenge story.

And while the story was captivating, the beauty of this film enveloped me like nothing ever had. I found myself thinking: “I will never create anything this beautiful.”

This thought haunted me for a while. But then I thought – why the hell not? I have every bit of capability to create intense beauty – just as much as anyone else. It just takes intense focus, dedication, and obsession.

The director obviously lives for making movies, and I clearly live for passion. When I thought about that film and how gorgeous it was, I started to think about ALL of my favourite things: in music, in books, photographs, art – the things that are so unbelievably gorgeous that how could I possibly fathom creating something on that level?

Well, why not? These people are as human as me or you. The point is to try, and to fail over and over and over again and then one day…it’s magic. It spills out; you’ve mastered your art – even if you can get even BETTER, you’ve reached a pinnacle moment where you just fucking SHINE.

But you have to start with crappy. You have to begin, and just do it over and over and over, and get better each time, and continue building, bettering, refining – and one day the beauty of what you create will blow at least SOMEONE’S mind, if not many minds – but of course you have to SHARE it, too.

And so, instead of feeling intimidated, I felt inspired to really try, to improve, and to “ship” no matter what, and take criticism if I must, because all I want to do is get better, all I want to do is create beauty, live healthfully, inspire others, help the world, and on and on, and the more we improve, the more the world will improve, but only if we share, only if we are brave enough to put ourselves out there, and you are the same, the same, so do it, work on what you love the MOST, and SHARE IT, so we can watch you progress and then celebrate your triumphs and faint with beauty when you reach that moment of astounding glory, because you can – we all can, we just need to find what we love the most and do it – or many things if we can’t choose – but we must do those things every damn day until we die, and leave something behind, a beauty legacy to lift everyone up when things are dark – those stories we tell can live on and help more people, inspire many, and make this world even better than it naturally is – because it’s all beautiful.

Funny how a movie inspired all these thoughts in me. I doubt that was the intent of the film – the intent was to create something beautiful and amazing, of course – but to inspire some random girl to better her attempts at everything she does – that was a byproduct.

So you never know if what you are doing will be meaningful or not – make it meaningful to YOU first, but share it with us, you never know how it will inspire someone, and make sure you put ALL of your heart into it, all of your PASSION, or why bother? If you’re not passionate about it, DROP IT, and spend that time on what you REALLY love.

Fucking do it or waste your breath, waste your time, waste your life. Time is the only currency, time is the only thing that matters – that breath sustains you more than any other thing – without breath we are dead in the dirt, and we want to thrive in the sky, making fucking rainbows and nebulas and galaxies to shine down on everyone else who is underneath a cloud of gloom.

Shine on shine on, and we will see it, you will burn in the dark and beckon us to follow. We need leaders, so lead. You can choose that role for yourself, so step up that ladder and be a north star for the lost.

~~~

Please leave a comment and share!!

If you enjoyed this post (or any of my posts!), please consider a small (or large!) donation to fund my way to a martial arts seminar. There are rewards for certain amounts given, so please help out with a “tip” or a gift! You’ll be helping me to improve so I can teach other women to kick ass in the future!

You can also follow me on:

Instagram: Lorrafae and Passion School

Twitter: MissLorra

Facebook: Lorra Fae Wildfire

Snapchat: Lorrafae

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You Were MEANT for This!

Once in a while I doubt myself. Don’t you?

Actually, quite often. I think this is pretty normal, unless you’re blessed with that natural confidence that is just within you since childhood, usually nurtured by everyone around you. That’s a gift that most people do not have.

When I get like this, I start to question the beliefs that come up, and turn them around.

Today, I felt like…”Everything I am doing is a waste of time.”

Do you feel like this whenever you start something new, make yourself vulnerable, or try putting yourself out there?

Try turning it around.

Like so:
NOT doing these things is a waste of time. Everything ELSE is a waste of time.”

Why else would we have these deep desires unless we were meant to DO them?

Don’t just dream themstep in the direction of those desires. They’re within us for a reason. They aren’t just accidental.

We also are no accidents. We are created into this world because we are meant to be here.

We are imbued with these desires and hopes not to taunt us, but to inspire us to get off our asses and DO.

 

~~~

Please leave a comment and share!!

If you enjoyed this post (or any of my posts!), please consider a small (or large!) donation to fund my way to a martial arts seminar. There are rewards for certain amounts given, so please help out with a “tip” or a gift! You’ll be helping me to improve so I can teach other women to kick ass in the future!

You can also follow me on:

Instagram: Lorrafae and Passion School

Twitter: MissLorra

Facebook: Lorra Fae Wildfire

Snapchat: Lorrafae

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The Danger of Inspiration

I love inspirational and motivational things.

Books, Instagram posts, Facebook, blogs, memes, videos – anything that makes me go YES!!! and want to take action IMMEDIATELY. I know I’m not alone because there is SO much of it out there!

It’s ENDLESS, and it can be addicting to read these things or watch these things, because they make us feel hopeful, they make us feel like we can succeed and prosper.

But just like a gym membership won’t get you rock-hard abs without putting in the actual time and work-outs, inspirational media will not get you anywhere unless you write out a plan and actually TAKE those steps. When does the INSPO end and the DOING begin?

What I’m writing here is not new information, clearly, but it is a CALL for action – it is me TELLING you that taking ANY movement in the direction of a goal, a dream, a desire, is better than just reading motivational quotes and watching some awesome person you wish you could be on youtube.

You can be like those people – but in your own way. You have to do it YOUR way – you can’t copy. It must be YOU. Wouldn’t you rather be fully who YOU are, than a pale imitation of someone else?

The inspiration you should take from ALL of these people that you admire and that you feel inspired by, is that they are just people. They’re human. They didn’t start with anything more than you had, likely. The difference, only, is that they kept at it. They kept taking steps. They started off with whatever they had at their disposal. They didn’t need anything expensive, they just needed to use what they had.

Better things will come along as you move forward – they just will.

“Do not wait: the time will never be ‘just right’. Start where you stand, and work whatever tools you may have at your command and better tools will be found as you go along.” – Napoleon Hill

The thing they all did was take action. Maybe they read inspirational stuff too, I don’t know, but that’s not all they did. They just did something. They moved in the direction of their goal.

 

So put down the phone, close your laptop, power off your desktop, close the book, mute the audiobook or podcast, and get a pen and paper. Write down something you’ve always wanted to achieve. What is the smallest step you can take in that direction? Do it – NOW. And then write the next one. If you can do it right away, then do it. But keep doing this until you get to where you want to go.

People have achieved crazy things that most people would deem impossible. Those people are just as human as you, so stop denying that you have power, stop being a victim, and step-up to what you are able to do – because you ARE able, you just don’t believe it. Shift that attitude, because you fucking CAN.

Why Life Seems Difficult

Photo of me by Aiko Yoshida.

The lament of most adults I know is that life is hard, annoying, and exhausting. I get it. I have been in that space, so I know. Even now I sometimes wish for the 90s when I was a teenager and had little to worry about other than how to get a certain guy, afford a CD I wanted, or how to get people to stop harassing me in school.

But adulting – that’s annoying. Or is it?

Definitely some of it is, but then why are there many happy adults? Why are some people happy and others not? Why are the vast majority just blah and numbing out to reality TV and large pizzas?

It’s because they are not doing what they are passionate about. Either they have forgotten, or they are afraid.

When you are aligned with the work you are meant to do, with the dreams you’ve cultivated deep inside, things magically start shifting.

But you must be taking steps, no matter how minuscule, to go in the direction you’ve always imagined. You must start somewhere. Don’t make me use a cliche!

And for god’s sake take care of your health. Without proper nutrition you are going to have little energy to spare. Do you really want all your energy to be given to A JOB? (a 4-letter work, remember?) What about YOUR work? The work that makes YOU happy and that makes the world better – more beautiful, more interesting, more fun, more fantastic – for you and all the people you could help aim higher?

Life is not meant to be a drudgery. It’s meant to be special – you are no accident. Your desires and dreams are not random. They pester you and haunt you for a reason, and they will continue to until you take action on them. Movement creates momentum, so take that first step, however tiny it may be, and then take another step the next day (or the next hour)! Even if it takes you years of daily steps, you will eventually reach your destination. It will be impossible not to, because you are moving in that direction.

The larger your steps, the quicker you’ll get there, but obstacles will show up. This is normal, in physical journeys, mental ones, artistic ones, financial ones – but inch by inch, penny by penny, stroke by stroke, word by word, you will attain something resembling your desires, but doing absolutely NOTHING gets you NOWHERE except the same place you are today. And are you happy there? Or are you lamenting how being an adult sucks?

When you’re small, you dream of being a grown up, to be able to do whatever you wish – and you CAN. Remember, you have been educated to think otherwise. You’ve been misled, lied to, and led astray by all the things you think you are SUPPOSED to do. You aren’t taught alternatives. You have to discover them yourself. You have to risk, you have to listen to your misery and see what it is teaching you – it is SHOWING you that you are not in tune with your inner voice, the one that has been speaking to you for your whole life, the one you continually ignore, and so other voices overshadow it – the ones that say you’re lame, that you’re no good, that you’re afraid, that you can’t, that you’re lazy and weak.

But what if you fed that other voice? What if you pandered to it? What if you let it scream so it drowns out all the others and sends them scurrying into the black?

That voice will then lead you, but you must LISTEN. That voice is the true you, and it is ageless. Being an adult isn’t hard, life isn’t difficult – what’s difficult is not being who you truly are.